Our culture places a great deal of emphasis on being prepared for bad times. We are warned against being too optimistic and told that it is foolish to think our plans will bear fruit. We are told to assume the worst and save up (if not give up).
As expected (awaited?), bad times come. No matter how prepared we are, we fall short of resources to deal with the situation – because hey – they are bad times. It wouldn’t be right to call them bad times if they were easy to deal with, right?
You may have heard – ‘Whatever you focus on, expands‘. Do you think we might be asking for bad times?
I mean, how much more focussed on failure can we get? All we ever anticipate is things going wrong. All we ever see in our future is ourselves dealing with truckloads of troubles. We don’t entertain even the faintest possibility of a grand success or lasting happiness.
It is almost as if we have accepted misery as the status quo and happiness as something that can only ever come rarely and never last for long.
Maybe the reason happiness doesn’t stay is because we don’t plan for its coming. We take great care in plotting out every detail about what we supposedly don’t want to happen. But we just assume the good times will take care of themselves.
Let us then start by figuring out exactly what great things we want from our future. In gruesome and ludicrous-sounding detail!
If it is fame you seek, think about what you will do when you are famous. Imagine yourself surrounded by screaming admirers. Picture applause and accolades. Think which part of the day you will assign to replying to fan mail.
If you dream of prosperity, imagine all manner of worldly pleasures before you. Banglaa, gaadi, naukar chaakar and all that. Feel the state of mind that comes with financial abundance. Imagine what it would feel like to not have to worry about overspending.
And don’t stop with the dreaming. Chalk out elaborate plans of daily routines you will follow when the fabled good times descend upon you. If your plan involves freedom, think what you will do with that freedom when you get it.
Visualisation is a powerful technique. One that has worked for me several times in the past. If you can get past the mental trap that prevents you from entertaining positive thoughts, it will work for you too.
You write well. It was a nice experience reading your blog.
I blog at http://blog.gauravgupta.in too.
Nice website/blog. Why didn’t you tell me?
Anyway, on the topic, too much of anything is bad. Forgetting bad times altogether or thinking that any preparation for bad times is futile, is not correct. Sometimes it may come down to ‘that small thing’ if only you had cared to acquire, would have helped you avoid losing something far far bigger. A balanced dose of everything is good.
Hope your book writing is going smooth.
@gaurav Thanks! Am already subscribed to yours.
@that me: I am opening this one up slowly.
Question: have you ever tracked how many of your visualizations haven’t come true?
Instead of believing in visualizing and pseudo-science, I prefer planning and then paying the price to make the plan come alive.
“It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
@ankesh I never said planning is secondary to visualising. Only a fool would not plan and only wish.
All I am saying is that visualising helps. If you plan and are full of worries and bed feelings, then your chances are that much slimmer.
Do see the title of the post. There is a keyword there.
@VM: you may think that I’m not reading your complete posts… but rest assured – I am. While commenting, I just focus on one part to amplify the meaning.
For me: visualizing is like reading horoscopes. You’ll find a million people telling you that it works and its true. But under rigorous testing, it has never proven itself.
The one sentence in your post that stood out for me is: “If it is fame you seek, think about what you will do when you are famous.”
My take is: if it is fame you seek, think about what you can do to achieve that fame. And then get busy taking action.
Visualizing what you’ll do after you are famous is akin to counting your chickens before the eggs hatch. It will more often than not lead you to being unhappy.
F— visualizing. As billionaire H.L.Hunt says:
“Success requires two things and two things only.
1. You must know exactly what you want. Most people never make this decision.
2. You must determine the price that you will have to pay to achieve it and then get busy paying that price.”
So the steps are:
1. determine
2. plan
3. act
@Ankesh: I have never thought you don’t read the full post. Yours are the kind of insightful and intriguing comments any blog would be proud to have.
You are right. I can’t prove visualisation works. Not even with my own experiences (though they may ring very true to me) becaue then someone might explain them away as coincidence.
Visualising is, as you said ‘knowing exactly what you want’. Down to the very last physical detail.
It is not something opposed to planning for your goal. Planning is part of visualisation.
I have already said only a fool would not plan for tomorrow. My grouse is only against planning for a tomorrow you don’t want. Being cautious is good. But not when it turns to downright fear.
Damn, so many comments!
How can I get more comments on Sursuri?
Beautiful. Like a rain drop of hope.
Found you at Sonia’s.
All best, Jan
@sursuri: Mailed you a long mail. Phew! Anytime.
@janice: Welcome Janice! Went through your work. I am not much of a painting person but it was quite interesting. “The essence of cakeness”
Hope to see you hereabouts again.
Completely agree with you. I also believe one should focus on what he wants instead of what he doesn’t want. Most of the times we spend our time worrying and thinking about things we don’t want in our life and by the “law of attraction” we make them come true.
Visualization surely helps. No doubt action has to follow.
“Vision without action is a dream. Action without vision is simply passing the time. Action with Vision is making a positive difference.”
Cheers,
Shweta
I hear what you are trying to say. I really do.
I have spent many years trying to avoid the bad while grasping for the good.
However a conversation with my uncle kept coming back at me until I realized he was right.
Enjoy the bad, it makes you appreciate the good. And the good will come no matter what you try to do, so enjoy that too when it comes along.
When the bad arrives I know it won’t last long. And the same goes for the good. If everything was good all the time I’d get bored. And the bad makes for some great inspiration.
Francis
(Found you through 6 weeks by Brett)
@Francis: Your uncle was wise. There can be no good times if bad times are not there to mark the contrast.
Welcome! Hope to see you here more often.
@shweta: Hello fellw tweet! Welcome and hope to see you here more often.
I really liked this post! I have been hearing that more and more, think positive, receive positive. I don’t have any hard evidence to support that it works, but I am willing to try! Keep up the good work!
@jenny I am happy you liked the post. Keep coming back!